In Case You Missed It

Welcome to the first installment of “In Case You Missed It,” your monthly pop culture news recap written by yours truly. In this column you’ll find all the useless Hollywood gossip you could ever wish for along with some bitter and brash commentary, which will never be in short supply. To ease you in, let’s look at the biggest stories from the past few months.


Some of the biggest and baddest news stories that broke this summer surrounded the popular TLC family, the Duggars. If you’re sick of hearing about it, join the club! The oldest son of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, Josh, who is married with four children, was not only involved in a molestation scandal involving five underage girls, but also admitted to a pornography addiction and extramarital affairs. While I admit that I myself am way too obsessed with this family for obvious intellectual reasons, these stories lit up on everybody’s radar. In fact, after the first scandal broke, their TV show 19 Kids and Counting was taken off the air, and officially cancelled a few weeks later. Rumors flew unconfirmed for a while speculating that daughters Jill and Jessa would have a spin-off show. But with Jill, her husband Derick Dillard, and newborn son, Israel, headed to Central America for a mission trip, we weren’t sure it would be possible. With their own family growing, newlyweds and soon-to-be parents Jessa and Ben Seewald could also use the money. And it was indeed confirmed by TLC just a couple weeks ago that there would be two or three specials dedicated to the changes in the Duggar sisters’ lives, which will not surprisingly not include their brother, Josh.


As far as the box office goes, this summer was almost record-breaking, being the second highest grossing summer in history. With box office hits like Jurassic World, Avengers: Age of Ultron, and my shameless personal favorite, Inside Out, domestic ticket sales hit almost $4.5 million between May 1st and Labor Day weekend.


Since the dawn of time, divorce has been something of a disease in Hollywood. After the heartbreaking split of A-list couples this summer like actors Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck and country stars Miranda Lambert and Blake Shelton, other couples follow the trend. Megan Fox and Avril Lavigne are single again, as is Kaley Cuoco, famous for her role as Penny in The Big Bang Theory, who cited “irreconcilable differences” on the divorce papers after twenty-one months of marriage. These people really know how to choose ‘em.


In baby news, celebrities are still coming up with ridiculous names for their children. Adam Brody and Leighton Meester recently confirmed the birth of their first daughter, named Arlo Day. If that doesn’t sound like a name for a farm animal, I don’t know what does. Ashlee Simpson and Evan Ross welcomed their daughter, Jagger Snow, this summer. The good news? When she becomes a stripper, she won’t even need to change her name! Seriously, people, why can’t we stick to the classics? Giving your child a “unique” name doesn’t make them unique, it makes them a bigger target for bullies. And while we’re on the topic, giving your child a regular name with a fresh new spelling also does not make them unique. It makes them have to spell their name every time they say it for the rest of their life.


I don’t often wish to get involved with politics in this column, but perhaps the biggest story this summer came from the US Supreme Court when they ruled that same-sex marriage would be legal in all 50 states. Sometimes I forget about this, but every time I remember I get this excited little jump in my stomach. Have we all appreciated this enough? Probably not. The LGBTQAI community has been fighting for their rights for too long. This is such a huge event in our history as a nation, and I could not have been more proud of our country on June 26th. This will be in textbooks, people! What a time to be alive!


Finally, I’d like to honor rapper Azealia Banks with my “Idiot of the Month” award for comparing the LGBTQAI community with the KKK, and then denying that she was homophobic. Honestly, I have no words.


For more information on any of the stories in this issue, Google will be your friend. Use it wisely. And now that you’re caught up on the biggest pop culture bullshit from the past few months, go forth and spread your bullshit knowledge! Because our lives just wouldn’t be the same without the useless gossip.